Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
