You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
