You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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