You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
