your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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