you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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