We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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