I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize