we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
