whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
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