He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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