I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
