morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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