im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
