This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
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