Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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