Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
