Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Randomize
