dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Your tits are I can't wait for
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize