i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
it hurts more in the daytime
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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