I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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