i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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