So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize