So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Randomize
