508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
