boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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