Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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