he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
