Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
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