you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
My penis needs a shock collar
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Randomize
