Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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