Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
