it wasn't lemon gatorade
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
You're earring is so big in my mouth
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
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