So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
