Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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