I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize