So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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