normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
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