anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
