I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
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