Don't make out with my wife yet
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize