Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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