my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
