so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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