I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
The chlamydia really affected his face.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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