dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
