kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize