dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
