i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
