I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
